^_^ i love me! ^_^
today go band... then i think i look at her too much... heehee. today she said debbie look more handsome in DP le... i wish i could say you looked even prettier to me... haha... but better not bah... haha... we had to keep a distance... the more i look at her, the more i remeber the past... i was happy for a few months... but now, i feel that i'm just nothing... well, after band, after concert, after her exams, i will disappear for good... for her, to find her happiness? for me to look stoopit? or how i wished i wound just change into another person. just like how narcia transform into kai in popolocrois... i wished those things are real... i wished i could just changed... be a good dog. be someone good... im soo bad... so evil... all i hope to be good... maybe i'm a bad guy in this world... remeber? i will be the one who try to destroy humans... i'm so beasty... i'm like waiting for my last rose to drop and i die... HAHA! haiz...
norahS, i felt extreamly regratful now... haiz... after reading her post... i'm starting to hate myself... could no longer love myself anymore... makeing myself miserable? is that the way to punish myself? how can i do that to myself? after blaming myself, what can i do? she asked me that, but i could'ent answer... i find it so hard to answer... like in and exams answering a hard question...... must it have to be a memories... must it become a story that must be forgotten? what she wrote, is like kingdom heart...
Sora's memories got erase by someone, and was replaced... but things got wrong. no one ever remeber who is sora... until that someone decide what she done is wrong and decided to restore his memories... but the process... so hurting... sob sob... Kairi(sora's secret lover) was the only one who remeber her... but only the name and forget the face and memories... so sad for her.... sob sob...
Haiz... I wished i could change my past... but i know i can't... i could change my future... but... i'm stuck in the present... i'll stay here for quite sometimes... I LOVE YOU, norahS/Sharon. I wished you were there... I wish norahS was real to read this... I Wished i could see norahS.!!!! WAHHH!!! I'm CRAZY! Sob.
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
i still dun understand her leh... how? haha. today we meet leh... haha... chat allot study little. haha. i also dunno bah... but my heart is in a mess now... hope it will clear up soon. i dun like what i feel now.... but that maybe means i am sad and means it's good. Haha... sob... me like crazy le. but nvm... haha. i'm still me... i hope so... even though if i'm not me, no one will notice? haiz... anybody care me? anybody want me??? i sometimes feel unwanted... just like a dog being abonden... maybe the dog choose the owner... so... i choose my owner... and my owner dun want me and igrone me... igrone my love... sometimes i wished i am her dog... she just will love me... i wont do anyhting sorry to her... i will do what she said... i promise i will be a good doggie... haiz... but i know... she wont want me thinking that... but how can i not? it's so unfair... i dun like what i am too... i just wanna be a good dog... thats all i could do for her now... nothing le... unless as a dog she dun want also... sob... then i dont want to live le... is this right? i'm like an injure dog... i'm in pain... but i still can move all around till i slowly die...
^_^ i love me! ^_^
I just wished he is mine... But i prefer SHE!!! Hehe... I loved him... But i would have even love if it's her!!! Look how handsome he is...
^_^ i love me! ^_^
norahS, I just watch finish Devil Beside You... Haiz... The story so nice... haiz... the more i watch, the more heart ach i am... all those ending, all those small part... haiz... i really cant do anyhting le... all i could do is to make my self more miserable. is that the right thing to do? i dun even know what is right what is wrong... what should i do? i want myself to feel miserable. that was how Sharon feel last time. long ago... even though it has past but i want to make it up... maybe people may say it is impossable to make up this kind of thing.... but i just want to... thats all i could do for her... my memories.... does it have to be only memories? i gueess thats all i can get now... should wont want me now... treating her like a toy... she must be hateing me... well, i feel the same way too... she rather have someone to hurt her then me... i wish i will just die, and go find another person to go into and go with her... i want to make her happy... i wished that she will be happy. wil, she is now... thats good... i guess thats all i could ask for... i will give my self sometime....
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
norahS, i still feel no good leh... not very bad... but i felt like i am being pierced through my heart but this time, i do it my self...
i've hurt myself very much... haiz... nvm. i want to take as long to heal as possable. I know im torturing my self but i want to... i wanna felt how the felt...... i want to hunt my self. i want to hurt my self...
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
I felt soo different when i woke up... I was hoping to see myself young and wayyy back in time... But wake up boi, that would never happen. I felt the same way before I sleep, even though it's just abit better, I felt the same thing. Don't worry, I'm perfectly fine. This is my punishment, I gladly accept it. So... Yeah. It gonna be good.
To everyone, well, this will be my last post. I will deleting all the post, leaving this. So, all the best guys~!
^_^ i love me! ^_^
Saturday, April 22, 2006
12:16 AM
Thx alot yeah?
Now it's my turn.
Haha.
To get on?
Haha.
No worries.
Who am i?
Hehe.
IamDaRkL0rD
TheDaRkL0rD
I'm suppose to be alone too...
With my beloved world of darkness.
Hehe.
I just hope...
One day,
An angel will appear...
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
Thursday, April 20, 2006
11:26 PM
Hey Guys, haha. Blog Because i went out today. Haha. This means that i was at home last few days. Only tuesday, went to school to return trumpet and collect my trumpet home. Haha. Other then that, nothing le... Lol. Well, today went to school to erm... check instrument? Something like that. Haha. After that, went to bk wid xx. Hehe. Taught her chem. I Hope it helped. Hehe. Two hours only... Tml will more bah... Haha. After that went to Zouk. Hehe. Erm... Went there to see some MTV voting thing. But it turn out that we went there just to see JJ sing one damn song and we waiting for so damn long. Lol Cos the MC was playing game and stuff... Crap! Haha. Was so bored there... Haha. And hey I did'ent drink... Haha. So yeah.
Ahh...
I'm creating back my chain of memories...
I really wished it would be more then what you think... really Please......
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
Sunday, April 16, 2006
1:32 PM
Ahhh... Ytd I had a dream... Ow man... It was so fantasic but it will never happen i guessed... But how i wish... Haha. After that went to meet Xueying and than Sengtat. Went to the CC for alumni band pract. It seems like a long long catch up rather then band pract. So long nv see most of them le. Then ytd chat with them. Haha. Well, after that we went to 85 market for dinner. Haha. Well, nothing much le bah. Looked more forward to next week cos Alicia will becomeing!!! Wahahaha!
Blah... Do i look happy? Haha. I just dun wanna think abt it.
Ahaha. Tonight then continue......
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
Hehe. Today was very happy indeed. Very long never so fun le... Haha. Well, went to meet XX to buy my trumpet beg... Haha. Very long indeed. After that went to Suntec walk around. Haha. Then we watch Eight Below. Omg! Must watch show!!! Graded A, story A, very exciting show. It's a true story. Wahaha. Means cool dogs!!! Omg. I'm gonna love them!!! I am so damn bloody wished i had one!!! AHH!! But... No... Haha. I can't. Sob... Yeah. After that went to Esplanade. Haha. Catch up for a while... Wow. And we really can talk for few hours... Wahaha. After that went to have dinner at Kenny Rogers... Haha. Such wonderful day... Ah... Well. Thx.
Thx Yeah? For today... Really... It really cheer me up and dun worrie. Hehe.
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
Thursday, April 13, 2006
12:11 AM
Well, it's wed morning, and i have to wake up so at 0800 to tample, cos it's full moon day(15th). To pray for my grandmother. After that went home to sleep for a while. Haha. Too tired... Den Yumei called me... So i ate my first and only meal today. Wahaha. I'm sliming down. Lol. And I Was late, yeah, again. -_-` We went to BTMB to check instruments den bring for our practice... Well, Yeah. We went to mac and stone for a moment... Then no where to go le... So went to Yumei house play majiong... Won 6 bucks... Haha... Nothing to do also mah... Haiz...
I think what one of my gc friend said is true... I maybe nineteen... But my mentally is still so young... Haiz... Good or not? AH!!! It's Suxs! Really!!! I HATE IT! Haiz... Soon, I'll hate what i am now... Why? So manythings to write... But i forgetten...
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
Remember...
Past do affect all future...
Present is just for you to improve the future...
But how?
I hate how everything goes now...
Why it have to be like that...
^_^ i love me! ^_^
Monday, April 10, 200612:09 AM
No......
I'm always worried about the future...
Good? Or bad?
Hope......
Hunting me, my past...
I'm lost again...
Between.....
Lost where?
Where am i now?
Us?
So is this what i have to be?
Always...
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
^_^ i love me! ^_^
My Past
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
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November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
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